Scissors Needed to Cut Those Wings....

My sweet boy is a senior this year.  I have had several friends ask if I'm okay with that, and honestly, I have been okay.  UNTIL the other night.  Christian College Night.  He was looking at all the schools and getting their information.  I didn't panic.  We have it all figured out.  He will continue his studies at our local Jr. College where he can get the attention he needs for his dyslexia and then go where ever God leads.  Probably U.T.Tyler (don't tell him).....I have told God of this plan...We ALL know how that works, when you try to TELL God your plan......

Then it happened.......The last table he and his friend went to look at.  Jonathan was tired, ready to go home, but went with his friend so she wouldn't be alone.  There it was....The Assistant Coach for the basketball team... He and Jonathan talked for a good thirty minutes.  He even came to Jonathan's school the next day to talk to him a little more about the school.  Gave him tickets to a basketball game and will tour him personally.

But my plan!!!!!!!!!!  THAT IS NOT MY PLAN......This school is 6 hours away......You see the problem what that statement is MY.....If it were up to me, my boys would NEVER leave my side.  But I am NOT Marie on Everyone Loves Raymond....I am NOT Marie.....Did you hear me????  Okay, I'm Marie.  If my boys would live next door, that would be great.  I mean it would save on gas, right?

The hard reality is my sweet, Innocent, loving boy is growing up and moving away from my protection.  But one thing I can say with confidence, he is NOT moving away from the protection of God.  Jonathan has a walk like I have never seen before.  He knows God wants him to do some type of mission work, just not sure what that involves.

Now, to MY part.....I will never be okay with letting him go.  There I said it.  I love him, I protect him, I pick him up when he falls, I talk to him about anything he wants, I laugh with him, I hug him....What will fill that HUGE void when he leaves?  RYAN?????  Oh goodness.....I'm kidding....I love Ryan just as much, NOT more!!!!! But I'm sorry, I will die a little inside when he leaves me.....

Jonathan NEVER let ANYONE tell you you can't....Always remember what Mrs. Bowie would say to you EVERY morning coming into her first grade class....."Can't don't come in here"
Always remember there are two people that are your biggest cheerleaders.....Your Mom and Dad.....

We don't know if anything will become of this college, which did I mention it is  6 hours away...But for a moment, my son was seen for the talent he is......And a great character off the court.

I am amazed at you every single day Jonathan.....You will do great things.....

But always remember what your Dad would say to you from the very day you were born.....
Jonathan, he's a great boy
Jonathan, he's a smart boy
but most of all he's a Daddy's boy..........

Happy WHAT?????

 Yes, it is true...I am 50...shocking, right?....I remember when my parents turned 50, I thought to myself, wow, they lived a full life....But today, I celebrate.  The reason for the celebration isn't the number...or the fact that I can no longer polish off a bag of candy and walk one day to get rid of the belly fat....It's the fact that I have lived to see this day in good health.  My mother lived only a few short days after her 50th before cancer took over.  Each and every one of my sisters have celebrated this day.  And today, I celebrate.  I can see my oldest son drive off in his car to school (would rather hover over him and drive him myself, but that's another story), I can wake up and get out of bed in the morning and decide to go anywhere....
My wonderful husband asked me what I wanted to do for my "special" day.  He usually thinks a BIG blowout of a birthday party is what is in order....So, I told him.....I want to go eat at Big Pine Lodge (holds a special childhood memory for me) with ALL my family...then I want all my sisters to spend the night with us. I want to laugh so hard we cry, I want to stay up WAY too late, eat too much, and even jump in the pool in the middle of the night....So, that is what we did.  Something so simple as time with my family is what I value the most these days.  I have never really been one to have many friends. Mainly because I don't invest the time. I feel as though I would rather be at home with my family than trying to go out.  Always been that way....I used to really feel bad about that, but I now embrace it.....

I started my weekend off with my wonderful son, Jonathan....We drove to the DMV in Athens to finally take his driving test...Now, before you judge, stop and consider the story.  Jonathan has been blessed with dyslexia.  It may have taken him time to do certain steps in life (pacifier, walking, potting training, etc...) but it was always HIS decision to do them and he never looked back. Added to this, we saw a very nasty fatal accident a few years back and none of us have been the same since then.  But, today, he is ready.  After a few set backs we drove to Corsicana and he passed.  God orchestrated the whole day. He put wonderful people there to ease his nerves and added a special lady waiting in line that stopped just short of attending a revival.  God is good all the time.....The Athens office could learn a thing or two from this Corsicanna bunch..... 


  Friday ended with watching Ryan play football in Garrison.  Not just any game.  A game against the school where the son of a friend that I grew up with in Longview attends, Billy Ray Cooper.  Now, he no longer goes by that...Just Billy or BR..... But he will ALWAYS be Billy Ray to me.  We did EVEYTHING together.
  Back in the "day" we would wake up in the morning, eat our breakfast and head towards our meeting place (his grandmothers backyard) and play all day.  The weirdest thing about it....his son is number 11 on the Garrison Bulldogs and my son's number, you guessed it....#11 on the Guard....That was truly a highlight.....


   On Saturday afternoon my family met at Big Pine Lodge (The Cox family arrived early for once)...We, my Dad and Katie, my sisters and families, ate catfish as we watched the Aggie game...Then went on a boat tour of Caddo Lake together...

  Friday night we arrived back at our home and sat outside with music, cigars, food, drinks, and LOTS of laughter.....Finally went to sleep around 2 a.m...(we all paid for that dearly) only to get up the next morning and have coffee, sausage balls, and eggs.....

  I am looking out my window and getting a little sad to see the empty chairs that just a few short hours ago had my family in them...a cold reminder of how fast time really does fly by...
Today, I celebrate a day with my wonderful, amazing husband, my incredible boys and my awesome niece (living with us while she does her student teaching) and thanking Jesus that I am healthy and blessed WAY beyond measure.
  I opened my fb on my birthday only to find I had over 200 messages from people I have crossed paths with in the past and today. Wow, how loved I feel.
I can't wait to see what the next 50 years will bring.....Today, I eat cake, tomorrow I throw it all away and hunker down on the getting fit....DRAT!! Already, I am dreading it.....Hopefully, it will rain really hard and I can put it off yet another day ;)