What I read at Dad & Katie's Anniversary Celebration:

Ecclesiastes 3:  To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the Heaven.  A time to be born, and a time to die.  A time to cry and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. 
Pretty good from someone that Home Churches.....

May 29, 1982...Michelle lost her Dad..Katie lost her husband..It was their time to mourn.

June 27, 1985...My sisters and I lost our mother..My Dad lost his wife..It was our time to mourn.

As my family watched our Father struggle through his new life without my Mom, we prayed daily that God would bring someone in his life that could cook for us....I mean, him...and take care of him...

Around May 1986, my sisters and I played on our church softball team.  Our coach and dear friend, Sue Wright saw we needed a good home cooked meal and decided she needed to take action...so, she introduced Katie to my father.

April 25, 1987..our time to dance came...My father married Katie.  Although Katie didn't bargain for having the Brady Bunch move in, she handled it with grace and dignity.

The year 1987...gas prices were .89c a gallon, Fox network made its prime time debut, Prozac made it debut in the U.S., Howard had hair, and our precious Kyle Stephen and Sarah Faye were born with MANY more to come.  And I had red, blond, black, and purple hair...not all at once...yeah, maybe all at once...

Ecclesiastes 3 goes on to say...A time to heal, a time to break down, and a time to build up.  A time to weep a time to laugh.  In these past 25 years, our family have walked through just about all of the verse...We have experienced weddings, deaths, sickness, health issues, sadness, joy, childbirth, graduations, ballgames, laughter, and tolerance.  We learned how to join these two families into one.  Great times were had on the back porch eating and just laughing.  Now, to address the "time to kill" portion of Ecclesiastes....just play a board game with Katie...she goes in quick and silent and you never know what hit you..

Thank you Dad for being the best Dad a girl could ever ask for.  I would have said this even if I weren't your favorite...

Katie, thank you for loving my dad and taking care of him for the past 25 years.  I know it wasn't easy going from 1 child to 5.  Thank you for all the great advice and just listening to me when I talk.  Thank you mostly for being a GRANDMother to my boys and investing in their lives.

And last but not least, I want to thank you both for your faithful walk.  You are truly an example of Proverbs 3:5....Even though your plan was not the same as God's, you kept your trust in HIM...and that is why we are all gathered here to celebrate you two...

THIS IS YOUR TIME TO DANCE AND LAUGH...

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU BOTH AND I LOVE YOU......

Chapter Closing

I am the world's worst at planning something far in advanced and then wanting to back out when the time comes to actually do it...Case in point is traveling....I HATE to leave home....I LOVE seeing my sister and her family, but it's the boarding the dogs, driving in the car, flying in a plane, working through the unknown.  I guess I'm just a "homebody"....

For two years now, I've watched my son go from this happy go lucky person to a very unhappy person.  Due mostly to his environment.  Slowly things have been chipping away at his comedial demeanor....I have said to him daily, "this does NOT define you..."  Only, I was wrong.  I believe if you stay in an unhealthy situation for too long, it becomes you...thus defining you. 

He requested to remove himself from the school he has known since 6th grade.  The only other school he attended was elementary and that was the same one from K-5th.  Our family doesn't handle change very well.  For him to want to make this change, something must really be wrong.  So, we allowed him to "shadow" another school.  He loved it. He feels as though this school is a better "fit" for him.  So, now we are in the process of closing this chapter and turning the page.  Oh if it were just that simple.  It comes with a lot of sadness.  I really grew to love a lot of the parents and students there.  But, on the flip side of that, I've grown to really harbor some hatred towards those that repeatedly "beat" (figuratively) down my son.  So, much to the point I too was unhappy.  One thing I am sure of, is when you are in an unhealthy situation, you MUST remove yourself from it or it will eat at you until there is nothing left.

My two boys will not be together at school.  That could be both a good thing and a bad.  As of late, it is a bad thing.  If ever I needed God to come to me, sit with me, and tell me I AM doing the right thing, it is now.  My heart is heavy, my eyes are full, and my attitude is bad.  I am in desperate need of a change.  The "what ifs" are surfacing everywhere....what if he gets over there and it's worse....Unfortunately, I am the queen of "what ifs".......

So, the school year is closing.  All that is left is finals...Then we walk out the door of a beautiful campus, leaving behind some wonderful teachers and staff, great friends, awesome opportunities, and some good memories.  Letting go of the hurt and resentment of those that hurt my son, and letting God heal me and my son. Finally allowing God to "define" who my son is, not the situation...... 

Day ONE (and Probably Only) of Getting Into Shape

Spring is in the air...which means in Texas, it is HOT....baggy sweatpants and hoodie will no longer be able to be worn.  Although I felt my best in them it just is too hot....So for weeks I have been telling my hard head self that it is time to get in shape.  To add to this, we are in the process of building a pool.  Now, last time I checked, the only full bodied (swimwear) cover up is a wet suit.  Trust me, I tried to get away with it, but people looked at me as though I had lost my mind...like I was looking to ride Shamu IN A POOL!!!!!!!  So, really, no more excuses...
Last week, I started my workout program...I looked in the exercise/game room at ALL the exercise equipment we have....BORING!!! I don't have a TV where I can catch "Army Wives" .....I tried lifting weights but every time my kids heard the dumbbell hit, they ran outside to watch me like I was the main event at the freak show at the Fair.....I got tired of them laughing so hard they were on the floor....I threatened them with ending their very existence if I saw a phone come out of their pocket and happened to see myself on UTUBE!!!!!!  So, basically I wasn't safe anywhere....Walking...I can go fast or slow....For THREE days I walked...Four miles.....Day four hit and I was not going to have anything to do with this....oh, the excuses came from everywhere....Dogs chase me....People want to hit me....Trees could fall and kill me....Why there are horses waiting for me to walk by so they can stampede over me....I NEVER said my logic was....well, logical.....I live in a constant state of paranoia.....
So, this weekend I said, enough is enough...I can watch someone exercising on TV and want to do that so bad....They run through a beautiful neighborhood with flowers and trees, green grass, and sprinklers.....AND a camera crew right beside them on the universal lot where just two days ago...it was a neighborhood devastated by aliens.....

Sooo....Sunday, I decided it is time to eat right and exercise...You NEVER started a program on Sunday....IT IS THE DAY OF REST....I got it straight from GOD!!! So, I decided, Monday I will start....
Sunday, I made Chocolate no bake cookies...time to carb up for my big ride tomorrow....I ate 5 cookies before I even knew what hit me....Took my sweet boy out to eat....large portion of Mexican food....This will do it....I am ready now...

Monday Morning, I get on my bike.....hair pulled back in a ponytail, with a ball cap on ( I am trying to NOT be noticed)....Music in one ear, the other to listen for that huge Sand Lot dog that is waiting, or the tree that will decide to fall as soon as I shake the road hard enough.....I am feeling good.  The wind is hitting my face, I can smell the fresh grass being mowed, the cows and horses are not wanting to stampede me, they are eating....everything is good.....UNTIL.....I hit my first hill.....HILL??? Today, I would call that a mountain....I am telling myself, stop, get a drink and rest....Are you kidding me, you just started....See how my brain is split in half and constantly fighting with itself....I kept going....Then it happened...I turned to find the biggest hill EVER....Okay, I can do this....I found the song, Rocky (yes, I really did!), turned it on and turned the corner to climb every mountain....There they were....THREE men about at the top of the mountain WORKING!!! REALLY, you HAD to pick TODAY to turn on the electricity to this house....They couldn't just wait one more day to turn on lights.....It is NOT a pretty sight..I am dying...I am going slower than I would if I were walking...You can hear me breathe, sweat pouring down my face, arms, legs....my hat falls off....It is truly a sight....Here's the thing, they should laugh....If I were them, I would be laughing!....IT was funny....MY TWO minds were in agreement....DON'T YOU DARE STOP NOW!!! Kick it in and finish....Finally made it to the top.....It sounded as though I had gone through the entire birthing process...Heavy breathing, clinching my nails into the handlebars, looking for ANOTHER lower gear...only to find there are no more....Who knows, I may have even screamed....But I made it...


Only to have Sparky the dog come and want to naw on my legs....I am pleading with this stupid dog to please go home and eat breakfast...not my leg...it won't taste good, it's all sweaty....Thank goodness a car drove by and Sparky went to chase the tire on that car.....Didn't say Sparky was a smart dog.....

I made it home safely, my legs felt like rubber bands and every chocolate cookie in my stomach turned on me.....Day Two should be interesting.....I think I might try roller skating....I seem to remember I was pretty good in my younger days.....

Why does the song," I'm not as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was" keep playing in my head right now...........

Stay Tuned...............

The House that keeps on Giving.....

The house that keeps on giving....giving me nothing but projects......My summer is starting out crazy....The first week of summer was spent with my wonderful sister and her family coming to visit....Our house was surrounded by lots of family for a week.

 This week has been spent doing the one thing we SHOULD NOT be doing.....Looking at a house closer to the boys school.......We were just driving around the other day and saw this neighborhood and there it was....The house we always wanted....Two story (my youngest used to think stairs meant wealth, so he LOVES stairs), Victorian home with a POOL!!! And the best part, empty and desperate for a family to move in and love on it........

As of today, we have submitted an offer on this house.  It has to be presented to the bank by a realtor only.  They say it could take any where from 60-90 days.  Good news:  we need all that time to finish our current house.  Bad news:  we don't get to enjoy that pool this summer......

This will be a journal of our progress on our current house and move on to the next house......

Day One:  (today) June 11:  We ( ALL four of us) cleaned out the office, swept the floor, and had to clean it with a chemical wash while someone vacuumed up the water....Hard work.....Then we put a stain on it....We, at this point, ended up being Jim and me.....Somewhere we lost the boys.......

Another project I'm working on is packing cabinets for storage.  That way I can stage my cabinets (where people will be looking)......

Finally, I purchased a table at a garage sale awhile back and finished the table but never did the chairs.  So, I am currently sanding, cleaning, and painting two of the four chairs......

Tonight, Jim and I are going to end the weekend going on a date.....We have committed to spend more time as a couple.....I can't wait to go eat with him.  We are going to Julian's.....Yum Yum.......

Measure Up....

It's amazing how you think you are okay with the outcome of something, in fact, you don't even want it, only to find out it really hurts to hear the answer is NO.....

It all comes down to "measuring up".....that is my number one enemy....I battle with this more than with anything else in the world. 

I am hurt and sad today.  I feel like I am right back where I was a few months ago.  I thought the path I was on was the way I wanted to go.  But throughout my whole journey, I prayed that if this was NOT His will, shut the door.  Today, HE shut the door.  Now, I'm left wondering what door I'm supposed to open......

Tomorrow I am going to be okay, in fact, I'm going to be good.  I have a great family that support me, NO MATTER WHAT, and a husband I love and adore more than anything.....

As much as this stings me today, I KNOW I'm walking the way God wants me to.  I have to continue to rely on HIM to show me the next steps. 

We are Family...I Got All My Sister's With Me...

Every morning I like to have my first cup of coffee out on the patio...The earlier, the better.....It truly gets me as close to God as anything else. The birds are singing, the squirrels are getting ready to attack my flower beds..My sweet boys are sleeping and NOT up.....aww, it truly doesn't get any better than that....

Recently my sister and her family were here. I like to work my butt off to get the house ready (meaning I cram everything in closets, mop my floors, and clean my carpets in hopes that they don't think we are hoarding ten-thousand dogs with that smell)...So that when they get here, we can enjoy our time on the patio....

I'm sitting here on my patio today, in silence, looking at all the empty chairs that just a few days ago had lots of family in them. This place was filled with people, laughter, stories, and food, because in our family......Where there is family, there is food.....We planned things, reminisced about the past, talked about what the future holds, and just spent time together.

My dear, sweet Aunt recently past away, and I was reminded of how short our time on this earth really is. So, my sisters and I got together and planned a "sister trip"......We are going to the place where we went as children with my Dad and Mom....I can't wait to see the places we went with my Mom. I miss her terribly....Everyday I get together with my family I think how much she would LOVE to be here with us.

God had TRULY BLESSED me with a great family. A family where no matter the age, we ALL enjoy being around each other.

Now comes the daunting task of moving all the chairs back into their places. This house will soon be on the market and we pack up ALL the wonderful memories and pictures and move to our next chapter in life......One thing is for sure....there will be more family time like this one.......

 Life is short, and life is precious....Make the most of the time you have with family and friends.....I never want to look back and WISH I had spent time with either.....I want to look back and hurt (like I am today) because I miss them so much...............

"I Will Rise" by Chris Tomlin (with lyrics)

My sweet Aunt Barbar has been battling cancer for over a year now. We have been sad to hear this news....We considered every added day with her a gift. I had the fortunate opportunity this past July to sit with my sisters and all my Aunts and visit for a long time. Coincidence or God's planning.....

Last night, at the hospice center, all the family had left for the evening. The only people there with Aunt Barbara were my Dad, Katie (my step-mom), and God. Coincidence or God's planning....

My sweet Dad watched my Mom labor in breathing those last few days of her life. He watched my Mom leave this world and enter Heaven. My Step-mom, Katie, watched her spouse, Billy, labor in breathing those last few days of his life. She too, watched him leave this world and enter Heaven. Coincidence or God's planning.....

Chris Tomlin wrote a song, "I Will Rise" that gives us a picture of what Aunt Barbara's last few moments must have been like:
"And I will rise, when HE calls my name.
No more sorry, no more pain.
I will rise on eagles wings. Before my God fall on my
knees, and rise. I will rise."

This song is based on Matthew 11:28, "Come to me all you who are weary and burdended and I will give you rest."

Aunt Barbara, who was weary from a long hard fought battle with cancer, went to see Jesus last night. She now has rest. No more sorrow, no more pain.

I am deeply saddened today. I will miss her terribly at every family reunion, birthday party, swim party, any family gathering. I will miss her wit, humor, and her beautiful smile.

I need not say, "Rest in Peace, Barbara Nell", I believe you are in the loving hands of our Father with my sweet Mother, Billy, and many other family and friends having the "perfect family reunion"....oh I long to see the day when we all get together..what a day of rejoicing that will be!

My prayers are for Barbara's sweet sisters, brother, husband, child, daughter-in-law, and countless other family members that God will give us the comfort only HE can give......