Excuse me, I need to catch up with the Jones'

This post comes with a warning......It's not nice.  It in no way is a "self help" to better yourself.....It is strictly an.....anything you can do, I can do better.....

I am trying so hard to be a better wife, mom, cook, cleaner, organizer, ....just a better person all around.  I recently had lunch with some of my buddies and one of my girlfriends ask me what I did all day....My husband cooks, the house is never completely clean, I don't work outside the home.  I don't even do the lawn anymore.  So, I started asking myself, "what do I do all day?"  Well, I have seen the latest HGTV "how to  do anything" shows...So, if ever asked, I can remodel a barn house like Sarah Richardson or paint like Carter Can......To take that a bit further, I can spend money like Teresa on Housewives of New Jersey.  I might could even dance like......Kate Gosselin.....

So, I am trying to turn over a new leaf.  I cleaned the house, did the laundry, even set out let-overs for dinner.  My house smelled of fresh pine-sol.  (that is my secret ingredient to make it "smell" like you cleaned)......

There is a Mom at my son's school.  She is everything I am not.  EVERY TIME she comes to school she is well put together.  Make-up on, hair neatly in place, cute clothes, and moving at a pace that shows she is organized.  And then there is me.....yes, I have on makeup, from yesterday, I have on my P.J.'s, and turning in on two wheels with papers flying out and milk spilling all over the car, throwing my kids out the door and telling them, "Run and you won't be late."

This particular woman, we will call Mrs."Get-a-Life"....that's my name for everyone that seems to have it all together.....No, I'm not jealous.....well, maybe a little....okay, yes, I am very jealous..... hence the name calling......

Now, Mrs. Get-a-life has a child the same age as my son.  I have told my son to stay away from that kid, and if he EVER ask you over, you will not go.  And don't even think about asking him to our house.  Because it would take me a year to get my house cleaned......

The day was dark and gloomy....My son got in the car and said these words....Mom, I have been invited to his house for his birthday party....Lightening flashes and a big bolt of thunder sounded... After grounding my son for a year for not listening to me, I eased up (only because my husband said I was crazy for not letting him go) and he said yes.  The day of the party I saw Mrs. Get-a-life walking the campus all put together and asked her if we were still on for tonight....She said she had not been able to do a lot of planning because one of her kids had been sick the night before and they were up all night....At that very moment I realized just how evil I could be......I smiled, toxins were released in my body because I envisioned her house a total mess, kids running around the party asking her, "what's there to do, you didn't plan"..........

On the way to the party  we are in the car, I'm singing, dancing, and telling my son to be polite...After all, this woman is tired, the house is probably a little messy....which all he could say was, "you mean like our house?".....after grounding him AGAIN, I pulled up to her house.....I heard angels pronouncing our arrival....either that or the radio was on.....None the less, the talking stopped.  It was a beautiful home...Not a weed in the yard, cute flowers through out the yard, birds singing and flying around (if I'm a bird, I'm perching here too), and kids everywhere, laughing and playing and having a great time.  I walked in the garage and she opens the door and immediately apologies for the mess in the garage....THE MESS?  the mess was three bikes on the floor and a skateboard.  I acted like it was a big ordeal to walk around them....I got to get my digs in early because I knew what was about to hit me......"The house".....EVERYTHING in place.  It was beautiful.  She had framed artwork from all her kids that looked like they spent a million bucks on  them.  She had cute little sayings on the mirror for them to "better themselves"......and then she showed me her cute little office that was tucked away in a nook...I walked to my car a bit defeated. There is no way I can ever compete with Mrs. Get-a-life.  I drove home with my defeated attitude and pulled into the garage, opened my car door and hit the ladder, tripped over the gas can, and knocked over a can of paint....I'll show you mess!!!!!

I asked myself the question...what would Sarah, Carter, or Teresa do....They would make a cute little office out of a nook....So, that is what I did...The next day, I grabbed my paint can that I had knocked over and painted my little nook....I went so far as to bring wallpaper back....I finished and had a sense of pride.  It was so clean and fresh looking. I even framed some of my kids artwork.  I went into the bathroom to write on the mirror and all I could see were  food particles, I even tried to connect the dots to make a picture...it looked like an elephant....no clever saying needed for that........

Now, moving on to bird feeders...attracts birds that will sing... Also looking for Cake Boss to build me a life size ice cream cake that looks like my son playing baseball  for his birthday....He wants to have a party NOW!! and invite Mrs.Get-a-life's son....My son told me at his friends house, (you know the one that his mother didn't have time to plan), his mother made fun little ice cream sandwiches with choc sprinkles on the sides...Oh, Mom they were so good, she is such a good cook......"Son, you can get those at Wal-Mart already made."  This is what got him grounded again, "I saw her in the kitchen (like that is so foreign to him, seeing a woman in the kitchen cooking) making them".....really, my son, really, you're GROUNDED AGAIN!!!!! 
My Little "Keeping up with the Joneses" Nook...

Side Note:  Mrs. Get-A-Life is beautiful both inside and out, friendly, vivacious, organized, great mom,  loving wife, and child of God....Who wouldn't want to be her.  I am privileged to just to be friends with her.  She is a person you strive to be more like. Perfect, no way, she would tell you that, just trying to live right in an imperfect world....