Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day….Who even invented that day?  I know!  …….a college student, who waited til the last minute to write a paper for her English class final. So she felt compelled to write about her Mom. Why not? The teacher is a woman and surely a mom! This will seal the deal for a sure “A”.  So, she wrote, let’s make a day just for MOTHERS!  We’ll call it, “Mother’s Day”.

This young student had never been told to sit down to hear the word “cancer” from her mother.  She never had to give up the dream of going off to college to start “living” the life, to stay home and care for her mother.  She never watched the strongest woman in her world dwindle down to skin and bones. And…..never had she dressed her mother in the prettiest purple suit to bury her. 

So, my view on Mother’s Day is quite different than most.  I was that college student.  I had to bury my mom way too early. There was so much she missed.  Boyfriend break ups, college graduation, meeting the greatest thing that happened to me…Jim, being outside the delivery room as my sweet boys were being born, watching all their sports events, having them spend the night with her all the time, being on the other end of the phone when I (and all my sisters, too!) needed advice as an adult.  Oh, the list could go on and on.  BUT…. what I did get from my Mom, was three amazing sisters.  Yes, GOD IS GOOD…..I can NOT imagine, nor do I ever want to, not having Karen, Julie, and Vickie in my life.  I long for the times we ALL four get together.  We laugh, cry, advise, cuss (just Vickie!) and, just be sisters and friends.  They say, “It takes a village to raise a child.”  Nope, it takes my wonderful family!!

I have watched my sisters marry wonderful men, bear and raise amazing children, and yet, all-the-while maintain their grace and dignity. Now, as we step into new roles, we see our amazing kids getting married and starting their own families.  Oh how proud my Mom would be today to see these lives unfold. 

And so, this letter is to my Mom……

Dear Mom:

Not a day goes by that I don’t miss you.  I am still a little angry that you had to leave me so soon.  Yes, I know what you are saying, “God has a plan.”  I get all that but, HIS plan isn’t always my plan.  But, Mom, you will be happy to know, I worked the anger out with GOD and we are good now.  How are you in Heaven? I know you knew a lot of people and the people you didn’t know, you knew within a day or two…..that is just like you.  I hope you are still singing like you did here on earth.  AND, more than anything, I hope you still have your fantastic sense of humor.  Have you tried any sarcasm jokes on GOD yet?  What is God like?  I bet you anything you have told GOD all about your grandkids.  Which, I’m pretty sure, HE already knows.  But that won’t stop you. 

Today is Mother’s Day.  So, that means I have to be reminded of how very much I miss you.  Guess what, I am a mother too.  Yes, of two wonderful, handsome, active boys.  Mom, they play basketball.  Yes, basketball!  Your most favorite sport ever!  Oh, I know (of course) you would have been at every game they played.  Guess what, they also played football and baseball…..Pretty sure you would have been at those games also.

You will find pleasure in knowing my youngest is JUST like me.  Remember the wreck I had with my cousin, the one I didn’t tell you or Dad about, but walked miles and miles to find someone at home to call a tow truck? …Only to have you see it on my face when I got home.  I now know you do know everything.  Well, my son had a similar wreck.  It could/should have been so much worse.  Mom, I couldn’t breathe for a while, considering the possibility of never holding that boy again.  I understand now, how worried you and Dad were when I did so MANY stupid things.  Oh, do I get it! 

You would be so proud of Karen, Julie, and Vickie.  Mom, after you died, we got so close.  We all four talk/text every day.  You would laugh at some of the things we talk about.  Your grand kids are truly beautiful.  Oh my gosh, we are so busy this summer with weddings.  Christine got married last weekend.  Mom, she was breathtaking.  You should meet her.  She is highly motivated.  She KNOWS what she wants to do.  To really know her, you would have to meet Julie’s husband, John.  Mom, he could probably get you that police scanner you always wanted...

Vickie’s youngest, Stephanie, is getting married in June.  Oh mom, she looks so much like you!!!  She is truly going to be a beautiful bride.  And, her husband-to-be is witty, just like you.  I want to look at the sunset on her wedding day just to make sure you are there watching her walk down the aisle. 

And then, Karen’s second daughter, Anna, is getting married in July.  OH MY GOSH Mom, she is so beautiful and talented.  I can’t wait to see her wedding.  It is going to be a wedding like we have never seen before.  Again, I will look for you in a beautiful sunset that day. 

Mom, I really wish you could be here today to see how I turned out.  Yes, I think I did okay.  I know you and Dad had your doubts….Sadly, there were many days I had those doubts also.  But I married a man that took those doubts and showed me how to turn them into positive things.  And it worked.  He gave me two beautiful children of my own and through him I got two more beautiful kids, Tiffany and Jimmy. 

I have written so much and know you need to get back to singing and praising!  Please know, I love you and strive to be like you more and more every day.  I just wanted you to know, your girls are okay.  We are more than okay, we are blessed…..because of you and because you are the glue that holds us together. 

I love you Mom….  

Nessa